With the days of celebration and remembrance recently past, I wanted to inquire with those who are not unconscious from marathons of movies; lying dejected because your ‘team of warriors’ lost their ‘grid-iron’ battle; or lying comatose from over indulgence of sweets, why is it that dragons are scorned for their habits of collecting things they find pleasing and valuable? Is it not the yearly tradition of many humans to raid poorly hidden treasure troves (some I’ve seen even bear over large targets and stars on them)? Droves of you rush the portals of these treasure troves, fill your wheeled baskets with items you consider valuable, and then offer bits of paper, wave plastic cards , or allow your handheld communication devices to convince the gatekeepers to give you your collected treasures. Really now, is that a fair trade? (At least dragons offer fair sport in riddles or melee before making off with their hard won treasure.) After this ritual, I watch these hoarding humans sneak back to their lairs, making futile attempts to hide their newly gotten treasures with the most preposterous method I have in all my years heard of; by wrapping them in colorful paper and stacking them under a dead tree brought into their lairs for this express purpose- REALLY HUMANS? You say DRAGONS have strange habits? At least the ones who stash these poorly camouflaged treasures in dark corners and the upper reaches of their lairs seem, at first glance, to have the idea mostly correct. But then, on the prescribed evening of celebration, they bring all their hidden treasures out to the aforementioned tinseled dead tree, where on the following morning, the youngest of your species goes tearing into these camouflaged treasures with squeals of delight. To make matters worse, some of your young have obviously lost their proper instinct concerning what is legitimate treasure. Why I’ve seen a goodly number of them discard the treasure, so carefully hidden in layers of protective wrapping, and revel instead with the flimsy brown chest it was hidden in. And if this ritual wasn’t strange enough, after they’ve revealed and given away all their treasure, they rush back to the poorly disguised lairs to obtain even more treasure.
But all this hoarding and camouflaging aside, if you promise not to ridicule my habits, I shall not ridicule yours. What is it that you find most appealing and are compelled to collect?
Yours until crickets roar,